Chewy Green Tea Noodles (v). ginger scallion, hoisin, matcha

Mission Chinese is an insanely popular hipster Chinese located in the lower east side. They don’t take ressies, which means you’d better eat early or be ok with waiting a while for a table.

Perhaps you should get tested for a disease or something and wait in Mission’s bar/waiting area for the results. It could be a while, so you may as well drink your worries away. Don’t worry, I’m sure you don’t have…whatever it is you just got tested for.

We arrived at around 5:30 pm on a Wednesday and the place was already nicely full, however, we were promptly seated. On our way out, however, the waiting area was packed to the spicy gills with hungry peeps. Most likely waiting for their test results, judging by their anxious demeanor.

Let’s face it, this place is fun! The décor is fun, the Twin Peaks soundtrack playing in the fake flower-laden basement hallway where the bathrooms reside (the lights dim creepily as you initiate the hand dryer) the cocktails are fun and the food is…well, freaking tasty! Oh, and fun.

Mission Chinese immediately became the place I had to remember to take people if they wanted an entertaining and delicious night out. Too bad my memory sucks, which means no visiting friends shall get the pleasure of coming here. Sorry, friends.

The standout cocktail has to be the Phil Khallins, which is served in a teacup and looks like a refreshing bowl of Thai coconut soup. And is similarly flavored.

We ordered a bunch of items but my favs were the Green Tea Noodles and the thrice cooked bacon, which is mostly rice cakes and pieces of bacon and the entire dish is just hellishly spicy.

But not as spicy as those wings! Not for the faint of heart, these wings will literally dissolve the first few layers of mouth skin. Beware. I loved them but no one at my table could really enjoy them. Which I loved, because that meant they were ALL MINE!

The complimentary fried dumplings to start with were tasty but I don’t recall them being anything that stood out. But hey, they’re free so you can just stop complaining. I’m talking to myself, by the way. I’m not yelling at you.

There’s a fun bar next door, if you wish to continue the night (which we did). There’s also Apotheke, a speakeasy hidden down a back alley in Chinatown if you still have energy after that (which we did).

171 E Broadway
New York, NY 10002
b/t East Broadway & Pike St
Lower East Side
(212) 432-0300
missionchinesefood.com

ALL PHOTOS TAKEN WITH AN iPHONE:

The eerie hallway where the bathrooms are located

Phil Khallins – Gin, coconut, kaffir lime, fried chili, ginger, lemongrass, sesame oil.

No clue what this is…

General Tso’s Old Fashioned – Rye, peanut and sesame, maggi, ginger, orange peel, chilis, palm sugar.

Koji Fried Chicken hainanese style, bitter lemon

Thrice Cooked Bacon ** (v). shanghai rice cakes, bitter melon, sweet tofu skins.

Chongoing Chicken Wings ** crispy beef tripe, explosive chili, xinjiang spices.

Red Cabbage Salad sesame, anchovy, crunchy buckwheat.