I’m a HUGE fan of Top Chef’s Dale Talde.

I still have wet dreams about this pretzel pork and chive dumplings served at his Brooklyn restaurant. I don’t care how overpriced they are. And they also make the best Pad Thai in existence.

So, when I heard he was opening up a new spot in Manhattan, I knew I had to take a quick shopping trip to REI to buy a sleeping bag so I could camp out the night before.

And by camping out, I mean show up a month later so I could read if the reviews were any good. I’m loyal but not a schmuck.

The star of the show at Rice and Gold is not the rice (it was just ok) but the Pho Soup Dumplings. Do what I say and order two orders of them. Don’t argue with me. They’re so tasty, you’ll be pissed at whomever eats the last one. Even if it’s you.

The cocktails and service were both top notch and the place is spacious and funky, great for large groups or just large personalities (good for those loud ass friends of yours).

50 Bowery
New York, NY 10013 b/t Canal St & Bayard St
Chinatown

(646) 630-8055

riceandgoldnyc.com

I was a little nervous to come to Dead Rabbit for brunch on a whim.

I had only done 2 instead of the usual 5 hours of online research so had just barely memorized the complete menu and my knowledge of the exact square footage was sadly lacking (but still solid – and I could find the bathroom with my eyes blindfolded).

However, I’m always up for an adventure, so here we are!

We were able to snag the last two seats at the bar before a crowd descended on us waiting anxiously for us to get the hell out. Until the upstairs dining room finally opened.

The Dead Rabbit, an Irish pub having been voted the Best Bar in the World a few years in a row, is a tiny three story establishment in FiDi.

Our waitress was friendly but just the right amount of cold that we didn’t incorrectly assume we could stay all day. Our expiration date was the very moment we took our last sip.

The cocktails were delicious just creative enough but no so esoteric that you wondered how many pretentious, obscure Italian liqueurs they could cram into one drink.

The food matched the drinks in terms of quality and flavor.

The corned beef sandwich on buttery grilled rye was the best I have ever had.

And the Chicken Pot Pie, while it didn’t have the usual creamy white sauce, was packed with flavor and that crust was perfection.

If there could be one complaint, it would be our bartender did not seem to want to bring us a water.

Which is completely understandable.

I’m sure her inner monologue (replete with a light Irish accent) was something along the lines of “I’m not here to hydrate you pieces of shite”.

30 Water St
New York, NY 10004 b/t Broad St & Coenties Slip
Financial District                   

Phone number (646) 422-7906

deadrabbitnyc.com

 

  

 

 

Some early reviews of Legacy Records tout this new eatery from the Charlie Bird and Pasquale Jones team as pretty but lacking substance. (kind of like me)

Well, that was my take away from it. I actually just Googled it again to make sure and only see rave reviews. So, clearly I have no clue what I’m talking about.

Best to click away while you can. Click far, far away.

While the place certainly is gorgeous, I wouldn’t call a place with great cocktails and an amazing rib eye as lacking substance.

Sure, the chestnut and duck pasta was unique but not necessarily delicious and the hand pulled mozzarella had a nice flavor going on but needed some kind of bread or crostini to go with it. And maybe a little salt.

The steak came perfectly cooked, sliced for her pleasure and topped in a gorgeous sauce that reminded me of a Chimichurri. I’m sure it was actually something much more exotic than that.

I would say this would be a great place to meet for drinks and either a meaningless nibble just to fill the belly or actually go for the steak like you mean it.

The place is located in a sort of deserted southern section of Hells Kitchen, right near (or maybe directly in) what will soon be (or already is) Hudson Yards.

(I should probably just delete that garbled paragraph above and save all of you a lot of heartache.)***

 

***(But I won’t).

517 W 38th St
New York, NY 10018 at 10th Ave
Hell’s Kitchen, Midtown West

legacyrecords.com

 

 

I ate here over a year ago (maybe two??) and completely forgot to blog about this wonderful, amazing, magical place.

If you ever find yourself in Brighton Beach (and you’ve made the necessary reservation, so maybe don’t just wander over to Brighton Beach willy-nilly) and someone is celebrating a birthday (as was our situation) then Romanoff is the place for you!

It’s a Russian Dinner and Show situation however the food is this sort of generic wedding food that really is not the point of the evening. Forget about the food.

The point of it all is the bizarre and mystical show! You get your cabaret singers (who seem like Russian talk show hosts who happen to also sing) followed by an array of colorful showgirls and then the entire place turns into a really fun dance party.

The entire experience is like some throw back to 70’s Russia that you never experienced in the first place…so basically it’s someone else’s throwback.

But a fun one!

I think the cost at the end turned out to be about $70-100 a person (depending on the amount of alcohol consumed) but it’s TOTALLY worth it.

You will never forget your time at Romanoff. Trust me. Even if you black out, you’ll still remember.

2670 Coney Island Ave
Brooklyn, NY 11235 b/t Avenue X & Desmond Ct
Brighton Beach, Sheepshead Bay

(718)-332-0222

romanoffny.com

 

 

 

 

Tacuba proves my viewpoint that the only good Mexican in NYC (besides Los Tacos #1 in the Chelsea Market) tends to be these barely authentic, upscale and slightly pricey but fun eateries with expensive décor and delicious margs.

My teeny order of fish tacos might possibly fill up Karen Carpenter (is that too outdated of a reference? I guess if I have to ask….) but definitely plan on ordering something else if you have any semblance of an appetite.

That being said, they were delicious and packed with flavor!

My dining companion loved his Aguachile dish, another super flavorful concoction of lobster and shrimp in a sort of ceviche situation, but get yourself some guacamole or even eat dinner somewhere else if money is tight.

But if money is tight, maybe stay home? I’m not here to preach to you, so ignore me.

The margaritas are only $10 bucks but they’re easily sucked down, so you’ll be on your second before you realize you’re a broke-ass B who should have stayed home.

Sorry, I need to just stop with the judgments. I’ve eaten at plenty of restaurants when the bank account was low. But life is too short to eat at home like some kind of homeless person.

 

802 9th Ave
New York, NY 10019 b/t 53rd St & 54th St
Theater District, Hell’s Kitchen, Midtown West

(212) 245-4500

tacubanyc.com

 

 

 

 

I really love Chumley’s.

It’s got a similar vintage basement pub vibe as 4 Charles Prime Rib but much easier to snag a ressie. Granted, you’ll have to put your credit card down and they’ll charge you if you cancel within 24 hours.

But why would you??

Chumley’s has a burger to rival 4 Charles (a bit bigger and messier) but they also have some very tasty cocktails, super efficient service and some fun, loud music choices. A bit more of a party vibe than 4 Charles.

Also, if you see that Little Gem Caesar on the menu, order it! It’s SO delicious.

 

86 Bedford St
New York, NY 10014 at Barrow St
West Village

(212) 675-208

chumleysnewyork.com

 

       

Every single review you will read about Ferris will be much better written than mine will be.

They’ll be using adjectives and analogies and witty breakdowns of each dish. You’ll probably even add a few new tasty nuggets to your vocabulary.

Much of the tone of those nicely written reviews will be lukewarm.

The tone of my poorly written review will NOT be lukewarm. I loved Ferris!

Did I lose you yet?

The menu at Ferris, the new eatery inside the ultra trendy Made Hotel (which looks more like a minimalist Scandanavian furniture show room) appears highly ambitious at first glance.

To blatantly rip off a blurb from The Infatuation’s review “Ferris is a restaurant in Nomad where you can get a very interesting plate of food that you don’t necessarily want to eat.”

The list of menu items does NOT include one single thing you will be craving that night.

If you’re still interested, then perhaps Ferris is for you. Trust me, you will be rewarded for your adventurous spirit!

We loved the ambiance, the service and the food however the cocktails sort of steal the show. Come here to imbibe with a few nibbles (the broccoli, bread and the carrot agnolotti stand out) and it will be the perfect night.

Located in
MADE Hotel

44 W 29th St
New York, NY 10001

b/t Broadway & Avenue Of The Americas
Flatiron, Midtown West

(212) 213-4420

ferrisnyc.com

 

Don Angie is 100% the tastiest new restaurant in the city.

If 1000% were a real thing, this would be it.

But 1000% is not real. It’s fake math, people.

I’m trying to find something wrong with this place. Lemme think for a second. Something like a rude hostess, a wobbly table or itchy toilet paper.

Nothing!

Don Angie is the perfect dining experience. *

 

*Sponsored by Don Angie. ***

 

***Kidding.

 

Ok, this review is getting ridiculous. Let’s real it in, Bun Boy!

Now, if you’re an Instagram foodie worth his Maldon Sea Salt, you’ve seen pics of the famous Lasagna.

The somewhat deconstructed monstrocity looks like a savory Cake Roll. Like a sliced up Italian Yule Log. In other words, it looks AMAZING!

But we didn’t order that.

We bucked the trend. We paved our own way.

We ordered a lesser known but equally delicious pasta and a simple yet inventive chicken dish that will completely change your mind about ordering chicken at a restaurant. 1000%.

I won’t bother describing either super flavorful dish, as by now you’ve already stopped reading and are scrolling down to see the pics (or clicking away to your most fav porn site).

Just trust me, the food, the ambiance and the service (and that INCREDIBLE zeppole dessert that looks like HAIRY BALLS) will blow you away.

Is Don Angie the new Carbone? No. Not yet. But it’s a hell of a lot easier to get a ressie here.

103 Greenwich Ave
New York, NY 10014 b/t Jane St & 12th St
West Village  

 (212) 889-8884

donangie.com

 

Blue Ribbon Brasserie is one of those old school, upscale but casual neighborhoody joints that’s been around forever.

In a city where everyone is on the lookout for the hot new restaurant, places like Blue Ribbon are becoming more and more of a rarity.

I think there is something to be said about having a familiar and friendly go-to spot for a guaranteed good meal that is also guaranteed not to have Avocado Toast on the menu.

That is excuse enough to patronize these kinds of spots before they all become extinct.

97 Sullivan St
New York, NY 10012 b/t Spring St & Prince St
South Village

212-274-0404

www.blueribbonrestaurants.com

De Maria is one of the many trendy NYC eateries serving inventive yet boring cuisine.

So boring it took me 6 months to write this blog. I ate here ages ago. Whatever minor tidbits my brain happened to actually remember at the time have long since blown away with the breeze. I’m the worst, I know.

But so is this place.

Just kidding, it’s not that bad. I just prefer to lean towards the dramatic sometime. You know me. Well, you think you know me.

19 Kenmare St
New York, NY 10012 b/t Bowery & Elizabeth St
Nolita

(212) 966-3058

demarianyc.com