I think it’s pretty much been established that Di Fara’s pizza is the best in all of NYC. Just check out every single top 10 list on the internet.

Di Fara’s is old school. Like, the a one room school house from Little House on the Prairie, old school.

Eating here is like eating here in someone’s wood-paneled garage turned rec room. Paper plates, cheap napkins.

Awesome pizza.

It really is that good.

One man’s Pizza Picasso is another man’s Dominoes. Sometimes it depends on what you’re in the mood for. Greasy, thin, thick, tons of toppings, light on toppings. Sometimes you just want a frozen Mama Celeste’s pizza from Rite Aid.

Di Fara’s will only be the best pizza you’ve ever had if you’re in the mood for that type of pizza on that particular day. You picky b*tch.

Di Fara’s isn’t typical NY thin crust. It’s a bit thicker. It’s also a little fancier, the sauce doesn’t get spread out to the very edge. The owner, Dom, will snip fresh basil on it. Plus, it’s expensive. A full pizza costs $30. A slice costs $5.

These facts may turn you off. If they do, go and buy that Mama Celeste I was just talking about. In fact, pick one up for me, too.

I actually think I like Di Fara’s square pizza better. Just a little more saucy. And a little more expensive too. A slice costs $6 and a full square pizza is $34.

Di Fara’s opens at noon. Plan on arriving no later than 11:45 am so you can be one of the first in line, if you desire to eat in the next 30 minutes. The place is small, they only have two ovens and Dom is the only one making all the pizzas.

Or, like I’ve said repeatedly, go shove a Mama Celeste pizza in your mouth and shut up already.

Sorry, I think I’ve lived in NYC too long.

1424 Ave J
Brooklyn, NY 11230
Midwood
(718) 258-1367
difara.com

Life imitates Art

Every time I walked by Tavola, I yearned to dine there.

Yearned. Great word. I don’t think I’ve yearned in a while.

So, when some friends from out of town wanted me to recommend a good spot for dinner near Times Square, I knew just where we’d go. Whether they liked it or not. This is my world, folks. The rest of ya’ll just eat in it.

Tavola is gorgeous inside. Old school, NYC Italian. Always packed. Dark, romantic. Or not. If you’re, like, dining with a family member or whatever.

Let’s get this out of the way first. Our waiter was bizarre. I think he was rude but I also think he might have been slightly out of his head.

He would ask us a question and then walk away before we answered it. “Where are you guys from?” and just as I turned around to tell him “Oh, I live here so you don’t have to hate me” but he had already walked away.

There was another point where he asked if we wanted anything else and before we could say “Nutella stuffed calzone” he was gone again! What the what??

Ok, let’s just move on now.

The food was great, so that was appreciated. The pizza was good but I was over the moon for that Chicken Alla Romana which is basically like a Chicken Piccata. Order that! As long as you don’t mind crazy waiters who have commitment issues. Issues with committing to a conversation.

488 9th Ave
New York, NY 10018
b/t 38th St & 37th St
Hell’s Kitchen, Midtown West
(212) 273-1181
tavolahellskitchen.com

MEDITERRANEAN SALAD BARREL AGED FETA, PERSIAN CUCUMBERS, VINE TOMATOES 9.75

CALABRESA BONA ESPOSITO’S HOT SOPRESSATA, FRESH RICOTTA, PLUM TOMATO, BASIL 16.75

CHICKEN ALLA ROMANA FRESH ARTICHOKES, LEMON, CAPERS & SUMMER HERBS 22.75

Mumbai Pav Bhaji $6.00
Vegetable coked in tomato gravy with onions, garlic, ginger and served with Indian style burger bun.

The Jackson Heights neighborhood of Queens is considered Little India. Samudra, specializing in Southern Indian cuisine, is one of the better reviewed restaurants on Yelp, so I decided that was the one we would check out.

Samudra is all vegetarian. Of all the cuisines to go vegetarian with, Indian is your best bet. The best part of any Indian meal is dipping your naan bread in some kind of sauce.

That and not having diarrhea a few hours later. Always a relief.

Everything we ordered here reminded us of an Indian version of a classic American dish.

The Pav Bhaji was like an Indian sloppy joe. It was SO good. instead of meat, the dish consisted of pureed spiced veggies. Did I already say it was SO good? Good. Cuz it was.

The Aloo Tikka Chaat was like an Indian 7 layer dip. Garbanzos, tomatoes, raita (which served as the sour cream). Very highly recommended as a starter to dip your papadam chips in.

The Rasam Idly was like an Indian Matzo ball soup. Not as tasty as the treats mentioned above. But at least it was cheap!

The Mysore Masala Dosa in an Indian crepe filled with potatoes and peas. A bit on the dry side, which is why you are given three dips to rectify that situation with. I actually wouldn’t order it again.

Not when I’ve got sloppy joes and 7 layer dip to devour! My poor, abused belly only has room for so much.

75-18 37th Ave
Jackson Heights, NY 11372
Jackson Heights
(718) 255-1757

Aloo Tikka Chaat $6.00

Rasam Idly $4.50
Idly soaking in rasam bowl.

Mumbai Pav Bhaji $6.00
Vegetable coked in tomato gravy with onions, garlic, ginger and served with Indian style burger bun.

Mysore Masala Dosa $7.00
Dosa with layer of red hot chutney and filled with potato masala.

Inside the Mysore Masala Dosa

Dipping the Mysore Masala Dosa in….uh….something soupy. But Tasty!

Paneer Makhani $8.50
Cubes of homemade cottage cheese cooked with tomato based onion sauce and flavored with heavy cream.

Shopsins is famous for their over the top food creations, the documentary about their gruff but lovable owner, Kenny Shopsins and for having staff that don’t really want you there.

They will throw your ass out.

There are a few rules to abide by when dining at Shopsins:

1. Parties of 4 or less ONLY. Any groups of 5 or more even attempting to be seated separately, will ALL BE THROWN OUT. Just look at the Yelp reviews, I ain’t lying.

2. Don’t ask the server for recommendations. Study the menu online. Know what you want to order ahead of time. The menu has 900 items on it. Don’t come here unprepared…

3. Don’t take photos of the staff, Kenny or the interior. They might not care, but they might throw you out.

4. Cash Only (even if that’s not true anymore, still bring cash cuz it’s easier).

5. Everyone must order a main entrée per person. 2 people cannot come and share one thing. Please note, entrees cost about $20 – $30 each.

6. I think you can only take your leftovers home if the servers are in a good mood. Be prepared to leave your food if you think you have irritated your server in any way.

We showed up on a Sunday morning around 10 am to no wait. There are only a few tables, so be prepared for a wait under normal circumstances.

Our waiter looked like he may have been in a band at one point. But he was actually really nice and didn’t rush me, even though I might have startled him a bit with how quickly I was ready to order. “Uh, let me get you some water and silverware first”.

THE FOOD WAS EXCELLENT!

I ordered the Cap ‘n Jack, which is this fried chicken and egg sandwich with Mac and Cheese pancakes as the bread. Their famous for those suckers, so make sure someone at the table orders them. They’re delicious, especially with syrup and hot sauce. The chicken was tender, juicy and perfectly breaded. No complaints. I ate every bite.

The Indian Girl sandwich we ordered contained surprisingly authentic Indian flavors “Uh, let me check to make sure that’s still on the menu” our waiter commented. I don’t think many folks order it. But the lamb was super flavorful.

I would definitely come back for their Slutty Cakes (creative pancake monstrocities) but only if I was mentally prepared to follow all the rules.

There’s a time and place for Shopsins. Make sure you only dine here when you’re not in a headspace where you might annoy the staff….or heaven help you.

Essex St Market
120 Essex St
New York, NY 10002
Lower East Side
(212) 924-5160
shopsins.com

Selection of delicious hot sauces.

Indian Girl – Lamb Curry, Matzoh Cauliflower on Ciabatta – $24

Cap’n J – Fried Chicken and eggs on Mac and Cheese Pancakes – $24

Time for a breather….

Since I’m a mindless slave to pretty much any Instagram food trend, something otherworldly drug my ass out of bed at…ok, well, a reasonable hour (no need to lie this early on in the post) and forced me to Walking Dead it to Brooklyn for the infamous “They look pretty but they’re just OK” Rainbow bagels.

As you can view HERE, the Broad City gals have helped make the American public aware of the dangers of these colorful little demons.

Here’s the thing. These bagels are certainly pretty but don’t taste like anything. Demons would probably have a more sulfuric flavor or at least taste really awful. These bad boys taste like whatever cream cheese you put on them.

You know the expression “Made with Love”? Well, there’s no love here (at least at the Metropolitan location). If you or I worked at a bagel shop, we’d plop a dollop of cream cheese on your bagel and then take at least one second to smear it somewhat evenly around the whole bagel.

Not at The Bagel Store. They plop the cream cheese on your bagel, sure. But no spreading. Just angrily smash the top half of the bagel as if they were closing the lid on a stinky garbage can.

Judging by the looks on every employee’s faces, you would have thought their job was to spread fresh poo on baby’s diapers!

Also, the cream cheeses all have this film on them (which is surprising, considering the joint always has a line of folks) and the overall place needs a bath.

What I did quite enjoy was their CRAGELS. As you might guess, that’s a croissant/bagel situation. Mine had cheese and bagel (and I guess, egg) smeared on top and I sensed herbs in the batter. Very much a pull apart, flakey bagel, which ends up being extremely messy to eat.

I showed up around 8 am on a Saturday and only two folks in line ahead of me. That being said, you come later, and the line could be an hour. And the rainbow bagels will probably sell out by 11 am?

Cash only and on the pricey side, I would still say that The Bagel Store is worth a visit, only for the pointless but obligatory Instagram opportunity. You can’t resist, so why even fight it.

Posting every aspect of your dull lives on social media is now a full time job for us all. And just like the war effort in the 1940’s, we’ve all got to do our part.

Rainbow bagel, duh.

Bacon Egg & Cheese Bagel with Jalapeno cream cheese

blade steak
broccoli | trumpet mushrooms | wild rice puree
$28

Our meal at The Pines was a group birthday dinner. This means that we ordered everything on the menu. This means, score for a restaurant blogger.

There were good dishes, there were ok dishes but I can’t think of any amazing dishes. The blade steak was almost amazing. It was really really good.

One of the main concerns with The Pines is that they charge Manhattan prices in Brooklyn. The food was just too pricey for the portion sizes. You can abuse my wallet when I order “small plates” (when will that food trend die??) in Manhattan but you just can’t do that to me in Brooklyn.

Overall, I still really liked this place. It’s got a great quirky ambiance. That Charred Radicchio dish tasted like delicious Chinese food and that steak was (like I just said ) really, really good.

But if I’m trekking to Brooklyn, I want cheap. Or super unusual. Or insanely delicious. None of these are to be found at The Pines.

284 3rd Ave
Brooklyn, NY 11215
b/t President St & 4th Ave
Gowanus
(718) 596-6560
thepinesbrooklyn.com

necromancer – $14
Gosling’s black rum | molasses | lambrusco | absinthe

I totally forgot what this was.

Amuse Bouche

winter greens
accidental blue | beets | farro-chestnut crumble
$10

rutabaga soup
apples | croutons | accidental blue | scallion
$9

charred radicchio
pork | pepper vinaigrette | croutons | herbs
$13

bread
maple-foie butter or cultured honey butter
$6

Potatoes

trenette
poached egg | fermented vegetables | pistachios
$19

borsa vuota
mushrooms | kale | alderney cheese | lemon
$21

skate fish
charred leek | endive | sunchoke puree | sea fingers
$25

duck breast
beets | buckwheat | yogurt | cocoa nib
$29

Dessert! (forgot what this was, too. I’m the worst).

Just like with every good brunch spot in Brooklyn, get there when Mile End opens or be prepared to wait.

Luckily, I know better so got there on the early side, around 11 am on a Saturday and was seated instantly. Everyone behind me had to wait until after we had finished eating!

You come to Mile End (either the Brooklyn or Noho location) for smoked meats. Particularly, the Smoked Meat Sandwich ($15) or the Smoked Meat Poutine ($16).

Both were really good. Not fantastic, just really good. Meaning, would I wait in a line for either dish? No. But I would definitely come back if a table was ready and waiting for me like a regular at Rao’s.

The poutine was actually tastier the next day, when I put some Sriracha on top! I think it needed a little spice, like a few pickled jalapenos or something.

The place is small. Like, tiny. Another reason to come early or not at all.

Oh, I forgot about the hot dog! It was also really good. That’s my review in a nutshell. Really good. Just a notch below great.

97A Hoyt St
Brooklyn, NY 11217
b/t Atlantic Ave & Pacific St
Boerum Hill
(718) 852-7510
mileenddeli.com

Mimosa – $9

Smoked Meat Poutine – $16

Hoyt Dog – $8

Smoked Meat Sandwich – Brisket, Mustard, Rye – $15

Look closer….deep into my eyes…..

La Surena – Grilled Chicken, hearty chorizo with avocado slices and spicy chimi-churri sauce

What is an Arepa, you ask? You didn’t ask? What, am I talking to myself? I am? Ok, let’s move on.

I had never had nor heard of an Arepa before I moved to NYC.

An Arepa (should I be capitalizing this??) is a Venezuelan (or Colombian) cornmeal flatbread, split and made into sandwiches. Similar to a Mexican Gordita or a Salvadoran Pupusa.

If this were part of a graded school paper, I would totally get an F right now for blatant Wikipedia plagiarism.

Caracas Arepas bar has four locations, but today we visited the quite popular, cozy little East Village locale to try our first Arepa.

The place is dark and cramped but service is friendly and prompt. There are about a dozen varieties of Arepas to choose from.

Here’s my take. I LOVED the filling of each one. Especially the Da Pabellon with it’s moist and flavorful shredded beef, black beans, cheese and plantains. SO GOOD!

And the La Surena, with chicken, chorizo, avocado and chimi-churri sauce was also quite nice.

The Arepa itself, I’m not so crazy about. It’s tough to bite through. It’s not super flavorful. It was like a really stale pupupsa. It was just a boring vehicle for the wonderful ingredients.

They’re also on the smaller side. This was perfect for our appetites this particular evening. But you should probably also order an appetizer if you’re hungry.

Also, if you have false teeth or veneers, watch out when you bite into them. You might be eating a $2500 Arepa, if you bite into a particularly hard one.

93 1/2 E 7th St
New York, NY 10009
East Village
(212) 529-2314
caracasarepabar.com

De Pabellon – Shredded Beef, black beans, white cheese and sweet plantains

BAHN MI CRIOSSANT $8
choice of chicken or pork, carrots, daikon, cucumber, jalapeño,
cilantro, sriracha

We stumbled into Alice’s Arbor when we were trying to dine at Speedy Romeo. The wait there was an hour, so we said screw that and wandered around in desperate need of food.

Alice’s came to our rescue. What a gem!

Super affordable, tasty and very casual. But also with elements of trendy and upscale, so you don’t have to feel like you’ve downgraded your brunch experience.

My croissant Banh Mi was decedent and delicious. Definitely a must order.

The eggs benedict was also fantastic. Only $9 bucks! Believe you me, you will not find eggs benedict for under $13 in any part of Manhattan.

They use the cheap kind of kale for their kale salad but I still liked it. You can consume a triple decker grilled cheese, a stack of pancakes, a banana split but if you also have a kale salad you can say “At least I ate kale today!”

549 Classon Ave
Brooklyn, NY 11238
b/t Lefferts Pl & Fulton St
Bedford Stuyvesant, Clinton Hill
(718) 399-3003
alicesarbor.com

The Hodad – Coconut Rum, Frenet Branca, Lime & Pineapple Juice – $12

I have no clue what this is.

KALE $9
almonds, apples, pecorino, pomegranate, avocado

THE JESSIE $8
Cabot cheddar, tomato, avocado, egg, lettuce,
on a croissant

EGGS BENEDICT $9
Canadian ham, spicy Hollandaise sauce, English muffin,
with home fries

My first visit to Ramen Lab was during the pop up takeover by Ichicoro Ramen, a Florida fushion ramen concept that resulted in me being a very satisfied customer.

I wasn’t sure what lay in store for me this particular evening, as far as dinner was concerned. I was in the midst of a delightful early evening walk, enjoying the warm NYC weather. I started from my neighborhood of Chelsea, passing through the West Village, Washington Square park for some people watching, Soho and eventually found myself in the Little Italy area.

When I realized I was a mere two blocks from the buzz-worthy (hopefully you consider a recommendation by Gwyneth Paltrow’s Goop website to be buzz) Ramen Lab. I saw a few folks standing outside, waiting their turn to slurp in some ramen magic and I gladly joined them.

The place is uber tiny. Only 9 spots at the counter in which to stand (no seats).

Like being invited to a friend’s house (that friend just moved in, so she has no furniture yet) because she made too much food and needs people to come over and help her eat but she’s also super busy and not in the mood for company, so you can’t stay long.

Sorry.

Now, I can’t talk about the usual ramen served here. I’m only speaking about the Ichicoro popup ramen. But watching the guys make each bowl of ramen, lovingly, was like watching art being made.

I didn’t want my food to be ready too quickly, so I could continue to watch them do their thing. They would place a tiny portion of housemade bacon on the cute little grill. Next to the bacon, some unusual gnarled green peppers were charring peacefully.

There were only three ramen options this evening, Seafood (I can’t), Vegetable (why?) and Spicy (duh).

The Spicy Abura Soba ended up being a brothless dish, which disappointed me at first.

After realizing it was a warm night and I probably was better off not sweating all of my internal liquids out, I took a liking to the idea rather quickly.

Finally, I was handed my bowl and instructed to break open the soft boiled egg and mix up the yoke with the noodles. Wow. Just wow. The yolk added an obvious creamy consistency which I fell in love with. I began to imagine what other foodstuffs a little yolk might add a little magic too.

The spice level was perfect. My eyes weren’t molesting every inch of the room searching desperately for the Sriracha.

I will definitely be back to try the regular ramen menu. I just hope the same whimsy and theatrics will be employed in creating the usual dishes and this won’t have been just a one night stand.

70 Kenmare St
New York, NY 10012
b/t Mulberry St & Mott St
Little Italy, Nolita
(646) 613-7522
ramen-lab.com

Vegetable – $12

Spicy Abura Soba – $13